One of the women at work today decided that the table where some of us meet to eat lunch and read newspapers needed “cheering up.” So she took some vases, put water in them, pulled some leaves off one of the borderline-dead houseplants in a corner, stuck the leaves in the vases, and set them on the table as “decor.”
This struck me as truly bizarre.
First of all, we usually have half a dozen or so people sitting there to eat lunch and read. There are always newspapers and magazines strewn all over the place, and much handing back and forth of sections, not to mention cheese and crackers. For now, the table’s pristine except for these vases of leaves. But it’s only a matter of time before the damned things are getting in everybody’s way, are getting knocked over, and are generally being a pain in the ass. Besides which, the leaves don’t look attractive. They look sad-ass. A single leaf of bleached-out spathyphyllum in a dusty vase of water isn’t chic; it’s dumb.
I appreciate her desire to brighten up the workplace. I won’t say I haven’t contemplated bringing my sad-sack houseplants into the office the way my neighbor and dog-walking buddy Marcia does. (Hi, Marcia! Long time no see!) But the lunch table is not the spot for water-filled booby traps. These leaves must go!